Our Machines

"Without a shadow of doubt..BMW.."
Datuk Oldwiseman - When asked what his choice of machine was


BMW K1300R
The lean mean naked BMW is the craziest of the lot. With a inline 4 engine that produces 173BHP at the crank, it rapes any Ferrari, Lamborghini, Maserati from nought to 100.

Moreover it looks like an alien...good for scaring Laoation Villagers.

K1300R Specifications
Engine Capacity: 1300cc
Power: 173 BHP
Torque: 140NM
Top Speed (Tried an tested): In excess of 250kph. Human can't take it, but bike still can go some more!
Capabilities
Attractiveness to Women: 10/10. Women can't resist the sexy muscular countours of this beast.
Running away from Police: 4/10. With its unique looks, and super unique no. plate (777), how to run?
Running away from robbers: 10/10. No robber can keep up with the K13R. Impossible!
Racing against Supercars: 8.5/10. Accelerates fast enough to beat most sportcars and supercars. Will lose only to certain Ferraris, Lambos, Bugatti Veyrons, Porsches above 250kph.
Offroad: 4.5/10. Crap offroad. Probably cant outrun a herd of elephants on the muddy plains of North Thailand.
City riding: 8/10. Not bad. a wee bit too powerful




BMW R1200GS
The undisputed King of all Tourers. Give it any, and i mean ANY terrain, this bike chews it up like a bear gobbles up salmon.

R1200GS Specifications
Engine Capacity: 1200cc
Power: 105 BHP
Torque: 115 NM
Top Speed (Tried an tested): 200kph
Capabilities
Attractiveness to Women: 6/10. Appeals to the adventurous woman, who loves a rugged, adventurous man. but dont think it will attract gu niangs.
Running away from Police:  7/10. Should be able to outaccelerate most policecars but not police bikes. Only way to escape is to go offroad!
Running away from robbers: 7/10. same reasons as above.
Racing against Supercars: 5/10. Prob win some sportcars from 0 - 150.
Offroad: 10/10. With its high ground clearance, telelever suspension, and spoked tubeless rims, there are few bikes greather than this in the rocky mountain roads!
City riding: 9/10. remove the side panniers, latch on a top box, perfect for the city.




K1200GT
The longest, heaviest and fattest of the 3 bikes. Perfect on the highways, a bane on the rocky roads.

K1200GT Specifications
Engine Capacity: 1200cc
Power: 135 BHP
Torque: 117 NM
Top Speed (Tried an tested): 250 kph
Capabilities
Attractiveness to Women: 5/10. Not a very flashy or unique looking bike. Women are probably more attracted to the round blue/white logo than the bike itself.
Running away from Police:  9/10. Very fast bike. can outrun most policecars/bikes. A gentleman's bike, so policemen generally do not stop K1200GTs.
Running away from robbers: 9/10. easy peasy. twist the throttle, and wave them goodbye. just dont let them catch u up when u are stuck in a traffic jam.
Racing against Supercars: 8.5/10. Fast enough to beat most supercars! 0 - 100 in less than 3 seconds. Good wind protection. No windblast even at 230kph.
Offroad: 2/10. Heavy, clumsy. Like an elephant on a unicycle.
City riding: 6/10. large panniers to carry lots of luggage. But sometimes too obese to squeeze between cars in traffic.